Current mood:	lonely
Current music:	Saliva - Always

i love you,i hate you, i can't live without you.
In this entry im gonna tell you all the reasons i DO love John and i'm gonna tell you things that bother me about it. I am gonna leave this open too for all eyes to see incase i decide to show John someday.



Honestly, i know how extremely lucky i am to love and be loved in the way i do. Many people live there life without knowing what the word loves REALLY does mean. I know that in 50 years the feelings i have WONT be here anymore. Maybe not even next year, but i am 100% committed to John. In every way humanly possible. Not because of me, not for him, but mostly for Dom. Dom is the reason me and John are me & John. John has been there from DAY 1. Anyone who has met us with Dom thinks he's his father, he might as well be. I know it's Dom that has kept me going, has kept John going. I'd be lost without him, he'd be lost without me. Simple as that. We're a family. In a really messed up way right now, but we're still a FAMILY. So here is my life.

I Love You
- the way he kisses me
- the way he'll talk to me til 7am.
- the way he smiles when he wakes up beside me
- how he makes cute little noises in his sleep
- the way he mumbles when he's mad
- the way his eyes sparkle when we lay together
- the way his lips feel against mine
- the way our bodies seem to fit together perfectly
- how my hand fits perfectly inside his
- how he wraps both his arms around me so tight i can't breathe
- the way he plays with Dom and actually likes to!
- how he's always been there for me, even when we werent together.
- the way he's the only person i can talk to about my past
- the way he just sits and listens and lets me cry
- how he never knows what to say
- how he drinks endless mt. dews, the taste of his lips afterwards!
- the way he isnt afraid of being snugglying and romantic in public!
- the way he supports my decisions 100%

I could go on and on!

I love you, i hate you
- the way i get ignored when friends are there.
- how he always falls asleep before calling me or getting online.
- the way he sleeps all day long when he's off.
- even though he's romantic, he isnt one for suprising me. I'd like that!
- wanting to spend more time together before he leaves. He promises we will though..
- him moving... i really HATE this, but i have to live with it.


Not many thigns i :dislike: about him. I love alot more. <3 He is my committment, he is my love. WE ARE GOING TO MAKE THIS WORK!!!!